Tonight I am grateful for the small headache wrapped around my third eye any the way my whole brain feels like it’s wincing forwards into this one spot. And how this one spot tells the story of my struggling relationship with coffee and long term dehydration and the comfort of being squeezed and all that wants to open up for me.

I am grateful for the scar on my perineum that has somehow entered many conversations lately and bares the proof that I literally ripped myself open to bring another person onto the planet. And how I am at odds with my natural capacity for stretching without tearing. And how I have a history of denying my own beliefs to better suit an environment of different thinkers. And how I let myself do what other people tell me to instead of following the magnificently loud but gentle wisdom of my body always trying to lead me in noticing where my mind is at and how I might be more benevolently sovereign in this hall of mirrors.

I am grateful to have fallen asleep with little Maru and to wake up in the middle of the night not too upset with myself. I am grateful for this calm observer that lives in me these days. I am grateful in this eclipse energy to have noticed extremely intense moments with my child where behaviour, impulse, reaction arose in my body… into my hands and my mouth… and how I would be noticing all the while and able to shift the energy into playfulness midstream without judging or shaming myself that what was originally occurring was unkind imprinting from my own childhood and the way I was manhandled and reprimanded.